My mother died of colon cancer on March 14th, 2007, eleven days before my 20th birthday. A few days prior to that, I dropped all my classes at the University of Florida to help take care of her. I was determined to stay with her until she got better, and then she just died. The cancer just got so bad so fast. One day she was fine, dancing and talking to me like everything was okay. Within 1 week she was bedridden and was so weak she could barely speak or hold her own head up. She was an extraordinary woman, Christian, wife and mother of five that can't ever be replaced. No words can express my feeling of loneliness and hopelessness. I just need a little help with dealing with this. I am a Christian and she definitely was and I KNOW she is in heaven smiling down on me and looking over me. I just miss the physical aspect of her. I loved her so much. I feel so weird without talking to her everyday. I know this is long but I just wanted to know if anyone knew any bible verses or anything that could help me get through this difficult period. Thanks. Thanks for all the answers you guys, I really appreciate it. there were a bunch of great answers so I couldn't pick just one. Knowing that other people went through similar situations and came out alright makes me feel a lot better. Thanks again and God bless :-)
Best reply by snookumz24:
you should listen to the song " never gone" by the backstreet boys. I listen to it everyday since my brother passed and it made me realize hes in a better place no more pain or suffering and that i can still be happy. you will get thru it it takes time . its been 3 years since my bro passed away and i don't stop thinking about him ever. My prayers are with you
Read the original question on Yahoo! site How do I cope with my mother's death?
im so sorry to hear that
u knw she’s always with u
she wants u to b strong man
u need to make her proud dawg
may her soul rest in peace
good luck man
b strong
aww hunny, im SO sorry for your loss. i cant even begin to imagine how horrible this is for you. i dont know of any bible verses but i think it would be a really good idea for you to talk to minister or a priest about what has happened. you can still talk to her everyday. she may not be there physically, but she is still there. she will still listen. good luck hun.
i know that pain well my mom died april the 8th of 1991 still seems like yesterday alls you can do is take one day at a time i planted a tree in memory of her thats where i sit alot the tree is big now and strong if i need to talk to her that where i do it
Well, i forget Where it is, but in the bible SOMEWHERE i don’t know my father told me.
I forgot the exact words so..
But my dad said in the bible it says, When People cry for others peoples deaths, blessings will come.
I heard it from my father so..
Yes, i am a born again christian to.
And, My Grand’ma Died when i was 7, it was i think 7 or 8 days after christmas.
It was… 2001 i think
But, Im over it though, i couldent stop thinking about her though for Rufly half a year…
sorry to hear she died, I know what its like..
im not really sure what to say. i am so sorry. im here if u wanna talk or anything. I know talkig can sometimes help someone out.
Sorry for your loss. I lost my mom to cancer last year so I can relate on some levels to what you’re going through. It’s ok to grieve, so take your time processing all of the different things you’re feeling. A good way to keep balance in your life is to keep yourself busy. Enroll in summer school classes, volunteer your time, spend time with friends, and most of all your family. There’s no easy way through this…so just try and stay strong.
try mathew 5:4 or 2nd corinthians.
my favorite is luke 6:43.
it might seem random…but it helps me remember who my mom was, and how i should continue to do her good will and be the kind, honest and decent man she raised.
First off trust in God.
I lost both of my parents . They were both in their eighties but the numbers don’t matter….
When you think of her think of all of the goodness that was hers.Hold on strong to the good parts so you can pass these memories forward….
Get back to the business of the living and all of the things that you know need to be done. Life the life you have and the time will help ease the pain…Don’t sit and ponder anything that kills you inside….STAY BUSY!
Please feel free to contact me if you need to ……………..
I will pray for you.
God bless.
Dont stop talking to your mother. She is now always with you. Its good to feel the pain and with God on your side you will surely come out stronger on the other side. Yes there will come the day when u think of your mother and smile and that is good. My dad passed last year and i still cry for him. The days do get better. I am thinking of you!
Oh have I been there. My mother also died of colon cancer. I’ve found that for me the best way for me to cope with not having her around is to tell and hear stories about her with other people who knew her — my sister, my dad, my grandma & grandpa, my aunt, my cousins, friends — everyone misses her, but everyone smiles when they tell a fond story of her. She lives on in everyone’s heart.
This Christina Rosetti poem was written in a sympathy card I recieved after my mom’s death. I found it touching, and maybe it will help you.
Remember
Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you planned:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.
I am sorry to hear your mother died. Time softens the hurt but you will always remember her. You will remember the good and the bad. You will think of how you could have been better when you weren’t. You will remember her suffering. You will learn to accept all of this and move on as she would have wanted. I am an atheist so I cannot help with much of the bible but it can be a good source of inspiration to those who believe in it and carrys alot of wisdom whether a person is christian or not. Time heals alot of things but it mostly softens the hurt. You should focus on the good times and try to not think of the bad. You will be fine.
I’m not Christian so I wouldn’t know of any bible verses that could be helpful.
However that said, I can only imagine your pain and am so sorry for your loss. I am also very close to my mum and cannot bear the thought losing her.
But, deep inside every daughter knows that it is the ineveitable.
So I just think this way that if this were to happen to me, than I’ll live the rest of my life knowing that my Mum is alive within me cause who else is the replica of my mum.
Mothers live within their daughters, in their memories, in their strength and in their love.
So yeah be strong, it’s your mother’s spirit that lives within you.
Take care and God Bless.
I am SO sorry for you and your family, and my heart goes out to you! This is one of the hardest things you will ever have to face in life.
Of course you miss her– you always will.
My mother died 9 years ago and not a day goes by that I don’t think of her and miss her. I simply cannot make the pain go away.
Please know that you are not alone, even though we are all strangers here together. Others care about you because they have been there too.
All I can say is that you take each hour and each day one at a time– some days will be better than others- some will be difficult.
Please– talk to family and friends– they will be your rock and your comfort. God bless you.
God is with you.He knows about your pain.Everything in life happen with a purpose.You will see your mom again in heaven and you will live with her for all the eternity.Right now your mom is in a place where everything is peace,perfect and in a place where pain and sadness doesn’t exist she is living with God in a beautiful place.GOD BLESS YOU!!!
One thing that might be good is to see if there is a support group for people who have lost a loved one in your area. You could talk with a counselor or maybe someone from your church.
The one bible verse that comes to my mind is Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.
I lost my mother when I was 10 so I know what its like. If you nned to talk more just email me. I hope that this helps.
second timothy 4 verses 7&8, psalms 23, john 3 verse 16. i hope these help you out in your time of sorrow. good luck and remember to dream. she will always be there in your dreams
I know how you feel I have not lost my mother but did lose 2 uncles and my 11yr old brother within 3 months. One was expected but the other 2 were sudden. I took my little brother’s death the worse; why so soon? why him? I asked my self night after night. Being a christan I too know that absence in the flesh is presence in the lord. When you lose someone you love It seems as if there is no way you can try to carry on life as normal; like how can I be happy when my loved one cannot experience life anymore. Time is the only thing that will heal this wound. I learned the hard way. I tried to forget and think of other things, but at night when I lay down the memories the pain ran through my head. Think of her, know she is watching over you and she is no longer in pain. Her time her is gone and think of it as she is gone out of town and you will meet her there someday. Never think you will never see them again. One day you and her will walk hand in hand again. I was watching a funeral the other day and I heard a the pastor say, “on this side we are the sad crowd waving goodbye and crying; but in heaven Jesus and the angels are clapping and rejoicing to see there sister again, and God saying ” Well done my daughter,Well done. ” So smile she is happy, think of the good times with her not her last days. It is okay to cry, as I said only time will heal this wound. Sorry about your lost.
My heart goes out to you and your family. I am not sure that any bible verses or songs is going to help you deal with your lose. I too lost my mother 2 years ago this past February 28th, and I know exactly what you are feeling. You feel as if you have lost a mother, a sister, and a best friend all rolled into one, because you have. It does get easier to bear but the pain of her lose will be with you forever.
In July of the same year I lost my sister and that just about undid any healing that I had achieved. But I am getting to the point where I just remember the good times instead of the sad ones. Only time will heal you to the point of you not being so lonely all the time. But you will never to loose the urge to call or go see your mother.
I know I have not helped you in any way, because no matter what we say your pain will still be there, but one thing that I can tell you is that if you want to talk to your mom, write letters to her, she will be reading them over your shoulder, and believe me when I tell you after so many of them you will begin to feel better.
I am very sorry for your loss. I understand your pain having lost my Dad a few years ago. I can tell you eventually it will hurt less,and that tho you will still miss her you will be able to think more about the good things than how much you wish she were here.
That said, it is a good idea to have someone to talk to when you are feeling overwhelmed with grief. Especially for the first year. For some people it is easier to talk to a stranger than to a friend. If this is you, find a good christian grief councilor in your area. If it is easier for you to talk to someone you know go to your minister.
When a person fades quickly it also is harder on those they love because there is not a transition time to get used to the idea that the person you love is dying. That makes it doubly important you have a person to help you through who is not also going through this. God bless.
I had a similar experience with my Grandmother, she was an amazing woman, she always said things that would crack you up. She loved to cook and we loved to watch her.She would always tell us you need to learn how to do this I won’t always be here. She always had a houseful she would invite to dinner on Sundays and was always was there when someone in the community had a loss with Chicken Dumplins or other comfort foods. Since she passed away there is nothing that could begin to take her place as with your mom. What we did was tried to remember all the good times in the kitchen, all the laughs we had, and we carry on her traditions of big dinners and helping people in the communtiy that are sick or in need. We realized we can never bring her back physically but she it there in our hearts each and every time the pots and pans start moving.And no one can ever take that from you. But one day we can go to see her. I’m sure she gets some real kicks out of watching us. But I know fot sure she’s smiling down on us. So you need to focus on the happy memories, the laughs you had, the good old heart to heart talks you had, and pick a tradition your mom did, and try to keep it up. You are honoring her memories by doing this and your keeping you mind busy. Nothing will ever replace the hurt or the loss. But just try to think of the laughs and take it one day at a time. Its not gonna get better overnight, but just hang in there. You will make it and make her proud.
Grieving is normal after the death of a loved one, especially when it appears that you may have been in denial about the seriousness of her illness. There are five stages in grieving from denial, anger, depression, compromise and acceptance. Not everyone experiences all five of them or in any particular order, some in combination.
As a religious person, I strongly recommend you go talk to your minister or priest for an empathetic ear and spiritual guidance.
Just remember that “Death leaves a heartache no one can heal but Love leaves a memory no one can steal.” There is an angel on your shoulder to guide you through this time or grief and loss. Talk to that angel who will guide your message to heaven.
i feel your pain 100% my mother passed oct. 5 2003 (my bday is on oct 19) i’ve hated my birthday ever since. heck i’ve hated every holiday ever since. christmas, easter, thanksgiving. they all seem so empty now. not as full and lively. the day before she died she felt better than she ever had was talking and laughing and enjoying life. she went to bed that night and never woke up again. the only way i coped was taking care of my children. i don’t know about particular verses but there is a book a woman gave me called the promise of heaven that helped me. also there is a book my mother had bought for me for christmas prior to her death (she shopped ahead of time sometimes) and it’s called God is in control. that helped a lot and oddly she wasn’t sick or ill and that book fit the situation perfectly. she bought it because i had recently went through a seperation from my husband because of his abusive behaviors and was stuggling with every day life. the best way i can describe dealing with that type of loss is comparing it to someone who has to learn to live without a limb. you have to learn to live with out a part of you. my mother was so much more than my mother. she was my best friend the only person i could truly count on. my ex husband was a total jerk and she helped me so much with the kids and everything. she was there during the birth of both of my children and cut the umbilical chord both times. she was actually the only one there when my daughter was born because she was the one that came to take care of me while i was sick (which caused premature labor) she also was just getting over the same virus and my ex husband was the only one who wasn’t sick so she told him to stay with my son while she went with me to the hospital. she sat by me the whole time i was in the hospital literally. she sat in a chair by my bed and laid her head on the bed to sleep. she was there through the whole thing and was there for me until the day she died literally. the day before we found her i had to work that day and she was watching my kids while i worked. my sister was visiting that day and they were cleaning out one of the back bedrooms that day together. (so you can see how sudden and unexpected her passing was) take comfort that your mother’s suffering wasn’t prolonged. that was God’s gift to her. my grandmother was ill with cancer and she suffered tremendously for a year and a half. i spoke with a highly religous woman after my mother died and i remember telling her i’m just so angry. and she told me tell God that. tell him everything He wants you to be open and honest with Him. i was shocked and told her i didn’t think God would like that too much and she said well why wouldn’t He? His love for you is unconditional and He wants to know how you’re feeling just like your parents would. if you are angry with your father in life don’t you let him know? and i have to say it made sense and i did i ranted and vented to God about every feeling and i cried and cried until i couldn’t anymore. and it made me feel alot better. i prayed and prayed for God to help me through and i think He truly did. i still have my days that are hard and i still don’t understand why. i don’t think i’ll ever truly come to terms with her death. but i am coping better now. if you truly have a hard time you may want to seek the help of a grief counselor. i think if it weren’t for my children i would have died along with her. if not physically then in spirit. i would have had no reason to keep pushing forward.
Hi, I too lost my mother to illness. I find it very comforting to do these things:
-Hold, touch, smell something of hers
-Write letters in a notebook to her
-Make a private time to “talk” to her
-Put flowers or cards at her grave on Mother’s Day
I hope this helps, you will be in my prayers.
awwww. your right. she is looking down on you and shes very proud of you. we all go up to heaven and it was your moms turn. shes in a better place. she wants you to be happy not sad.